


Cast A Long Shadow

by stargatefan_archivist



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Action/Adventure, Drama, Gen, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-04-12
Updated: 2005-04-12
Packaged: 2018-10-06 13:48:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10335998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stargatefan_archivist/pseuds/stargatefan_archivist
Summary: Spoilers: "Shades of Gray"Summary: The events of "Shades of Gray" cast a long shadow that threatento cost Jack his best friend, and Daniel his life.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Yuma, the archivist: this work was originally archived at [Stargatefan.com](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Stargatefan.com). To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [StargateFan Archive Collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/StargateFan_Archive_Collection).

Stargate SG-1 | Missing Scene Fanfiction | Cast A Long Shadow

The trigger felt cold and slippery with sweat, but at the same time, hard under Jack's finger. He watched through the sights as Daniel puttered around his kitchen making tea, then settled himself in the corner of the sofa, stifling a yawn, mug steaming softly on the side table.

Distantly he could hear someone swearing. Truly impressive usage, he thought idly as he carefully took aim at Daniel's chest. He had a clear shot at Daniel's head, but he'd rather play it safe; the midsection was much more forgiving if your aim was slightly off.

...the cursing seemed to be growing louder.

Lowering the rifle, Jack frowned and glanced around the empty room. Nothing. Turning back to Daniel he had to grin. The archaeologist had *already* fallen asleep while reading, head slumped back against the cushions, mouth slightly open, book flat against his stomach.

Did Daniel *ever* sleep in his bed! Shaking his head, again he lifted the rifle and carefully sighted on the target. As he squeezed the trigger the cursing he'd heard earlier was back, furious, loud and ferocious. And at the last second he jerked the shot off and watched as it hit Daniel high in the shoulder.

...while at the same moment becoming aware that the cursing was his own voice. A continuous stream of obscenities forced through a throat so tight it sounded like he was snarling instead of speaking. Putting a shaking hand to his face, he found it wet with tears and sweat. He stared through the window across the street at Daniel's body, limp, and the shoulder blood-soaked. Daniel's mouth was still open, head still back against the cushions, but the book had fallen to the floor when he convulsed from the shot.

There was a *thump* as the gun slipped to the floor from Jack's nerveless fingers and he startled. Then his clumsy fingers were groping through his pants pocket for the cell phone. The 911 operator answered, her tone brisk and impersonal. He had to clear his throat twice before he could actually speak.

"There's been a shooting..." As he numbly gave Daniel's address, and then disconnected before giving his name, his eyes never left Daniel's unmoving form. He stayed long enough to watch the ambulance come and bundle a presumably still live Daniel Jackson into its depths before awkwardly finding his way out of the empty house he didn't recognize and onto the dark suburban street. His truck was parked in front of the house. Jack got in and headed for the mountain.

Hammond stared through the one way glass at the haggard face of his 2IC. Then he glanced at Major Samantha Carter, who stood beside him looking pale and worn.

"Are you telling me that Colonel O'Neill claims he tried to murder Dr. Jackson?"

Major Carter's hands clenched to white-knuckles on the back of the chair she was gripping. She didn't turn to look at the General when she answered.

"The colonel claims that he woke up with a gun in his hand staring at Daniel who had just been shot. He called 911 and then came directly here."

"And Dr. Jackson?"

"Dr. Frasier is having him moved to the SGC infirmary first thing this morning. He's, well, he should be fine." She finally turned to look at the general for the first time. "General, if Colonel O'Neill did shoot Daniel, I'm sure he was under some kind of outside compulsion to do so."

"I agree with you, Major," said Hammond firmly. "But obviously I'm a little concerned about what else might happen! In light of the situation I'm restricting the rest of SG-1 to the base until we have a better handle on what is going on." Sam nodded.

"I understand, sir. I've sent a message to my father. I'm hoping the Tok'ra can shed a little light on the problem."

"Good idea. In the meantime, have you talked at all to Colonel O'Neill?"

"Just long enough to confirm what he told the MP's when he turned himself in."

They both gazed silently at the hunched figure of Colonel Jack O'Neill, hands folded on the table, eyes on his hands.

"The Colonel would *never* hurt Daniel," Sam said again fiercely, not looking away from the image.

"The problem, Major," Hammond said gently, "is that he already did."

This was a nightmare. This is not actually happening. This could not BE happening, Jack kept chanting. But every time he dared look away from his hands tightly folded on the table, he saw the dull grey walls of the holding cell that told him this was worse than a nightmare. It was reality.

He didn't know if Daniel was dead or alive and savagely enjoyed the pain that ripped through him at the thought of Daniel dead at his hand. He refused to allow himself the grace of grief, instead choosing to flay his raw nerves with the guilt of yet another death he could hold himself directly accountable for. He wouldn't even allow himself to ask how Daniel was.

Again he forced into his mind the memory of the rifle jerking in his hands. See that, he said viciously to himself. Why didn't you wake up sooner, Jack! You're trained black ops, Colonel O'Neill! You've been taught how to fight mind control! You weren't just a passenger! If Daniel is dead, it's because *you* let it happen.

Daniel swallowed, or least tried to. An ice chip was slipped in between his dry lips and he sucked at it greedily. The antiseptic smell told him before he opened his eyes that once again he was in the infirmary. He wondered what it was for this time and decided to open his eyes anyway. To his surprise though, it wasn't Jack wielding the Styrofoam cup of ice; it was Sam sitting there. She smiled reassuringly. Before he could ask, she neatly popped another ice chip in his mouth and called to Janet over her shoulder.

The petite MD was there and the dreaded penlight out and blinding him before he could even protest. Daniel knew better than to try to twist away, not that he could have, since he appeared to have exactly enough strength to open his eyes and even that was starting to tax his energy. He satisfied himself with a grunt of discomfort instead.

"I know, I know," soothed Frasier in response to the protest. Apparently well-pleased with whatever his eyes managed to do, she leaned back and looked at him, her own eyes narrowed. He felt like something scraped off the bottom of Teal'c's shoe. It hurt to move, hurt to breathe, crap, it even hurt to blink.

"We had to cut back on the pain meds to be sure you could wake up, Daniel."

Something in her voice, and in Sam's face hovering worriedly over Janet's shoulder made him tense.

"J'ck?"

`God, was that his voice? Thank goodness they'd heard him though, because he wasn't sure he'd be able to speak again.'

They exchanged a quick look.

"Jack's fine, Daniel. Don't worry," Sam said, trying to reassure him. He looked from one to the other. There was something they weren't telling him.

"S'rong?" he managed to wheeze out. Moving to stand beside him, Sam slipped another ice chip between his lips. He tried to blink gratefully.

"You don't remember what happened? You didn't see anything?" questioned Janet, her eyes intent on him. Wearily he shook his head and instantly regretted it as the room hazed around him from the pain in his chest and shoulder.

"You were shot while you were at home, Daniel," he heard her voice going on, as though she had moved very far away. Furiously he fought back the pain. He needed to hear this, damnit!

"Sam, Jack and Teal'c are all perfectly safe." Cautiously he opened his eyes again. The room appeared to be normally lit again and not daring to try to speak, he gestured minutely towards himself. Thankfully Sam caught it.

"No, we're still establishing who was trying to kill you." Daniel wasn't satisfied with that answer, but pain and shock along with the pain meds Janet had just injected into his IV meant he wasn't going to have any more questions answered right now.

Hammond sat at his desk, methodically working his way though the piles of paperwork that seemed to spawn there whenever he stepped away. He couldn't honestly say he had any idea what any of the dozen or so reports said that he had theoretically just read and approved, but they were moving slowly from his In box to his Out box, and that was going to have to be good enough under the circumstances. To his immense relief, someone knocked at the door.

"Come in," called Hammond. He was relieved to see Dr. Frasier standing in the doorway. She carefully closed the door behind her, a large white folder in her hand.

"I think I might have the beginning of an explanation for what happened." She slipped the scan out of the folder and held it up to the light. "This is an MRI taken of Colonel O'Neill's brainstem. Do you see this area?" and she circled a small area with her finger. "It's not visible on this scan, but I detected some metal there. When I magnified the scan, I discovered a device with hair-like tendrils extending from the object that are buried in Colonel O'Neill's brain tissue." Janet looked at Hammond, who was no one's fool.

"What is it?" asked the General, his unease showing the brusqueness of his tone. 

"Major Carter is investigating right now, but when I ran it by some specialists, the consensus is it's some kind of micro transmitter."

"How the hell did it get inside Colonel O'Neill?"

Frasier was already anticipating the question.

"It's actually small enough to be injected with a needle. If it is as sophisticated as the techs I showed it to seem to think, it could very well have been remotely guided into place to have close proximity to the colonel's brain for command transmissions."

"So my second in command is under unknown enemy control?" Hammond said in a surprisingly calm voice. The only giveaway was the flush creeping up from his collar. This had been an extremely difficult situation to begin with; aside from the political and military ramifications, the unpalatable fact that SG-1 was literally tearing itself apart before his eyes was personally painful. He cared deeply for all "his people," but the four disparate individuals who had become his flagship team held a very special place both in his life and his heart.

"There's both good news and bad news," Frasier responded.

"I could really use some good news right about now, Doctor."

"The only member of SG-1 that appears to have this device implanted is O'Neill."

"I'm still waiting for the good news, Doctor," the General said crisply.

"Major Carter is fairly certain the device can be deactivated," Frasier continued, beginning to grow a little flushed herself.

"I take it that its removal is not an option?" Dr. Frasier compressed her lips and shook her head.

"I'm still studying it to see if we can even access it, but it is located in a highly sensitive area; we don't have any idea how far those tendrils coming out of it extend into the Colonel's nervous system." Hammond heaved a gusty sigh.

"Thank you, Doctor. Keep me apprised of the situation. And how is Dr. Jackson?"

Frasier brightened. "He's pretty uncomfortable, but the wound was really just a deep flesh wound. The bullet went straight through and didn't hit any major organs. A day or two of antibiotics in the infirmary just to be sure but I think he'll be fine."

"Anything else I should be aware of, Doctor?"

Janet paused a moment, looking down. Then she met the General's sharp blue eyes.

"O'Neill believes he regained some measure of control at the last minute. Apparently though, there seemed to be no dichotomy between being Daniel's friend and team leader and trying to kill him. He says he first became aware as the rifle was going off in his hands."

The general mused for a moment on the horror drenched experience that must have been. He shook his head.

"Does Dr. Jackson know who shot him?"

Frasier sighed. "He never saw Colonel O'Neill, if that's what you mean, and no one has told him."

"Right. Do you think we need to bring Dr. McKenzie in on this?" He hoped she'd say no and was relieved when she did.

"Not until we have more data on exactly what happened."

"Thank you, Doctor. That'll be all."

"Yes, sir," and Janet Frasier excused herself and headed back to her patients. Both of them.

When Daniel woke this time his head was much clearer, and it was Teal'c in charge of the ice chips, the white cup absurdly small in his large capable brown hands.

"DanielJackson, you are awake," he rumbled in his velvet voice, looking pleased.

Daniel blinked at him blearily for a minute.

"What happened?" He was pleased that this time his voice sounded nearly normal. "Shot, right?"

"That is correct," Teal'c responded without elaborating. "Are you suffering any discomfort?"

A quick survey of his extremities told him he was injured, but not too badly.

"I'm ok. So now we agree *what* happened to me, have we decided who?"

Now Teal'c looked uncomfortable. "That is still being determined."

"Where is Jack?" Daniel scanned the room behind Teal'c. "I remember Janet saying you were all fine."

"He is speaking with General Hammond."

Sam walked up as Teal'c finished speaking, to his evident relief.

"Daniel! Good to see you awake again. How're you feeling?"

"Well, you know, being shot isn't exactly my idea of fun but I'll get over it. Jack is alright, isn't he?"

Again that hesitation that was really starting to raise Daniel's worry. He glanced from Sam back to Teal'c and then back to Sam.

"Sam? Tell me what is going on?"

The monitors around Daniel's bed were starting to increase the intensity of their varied beeping and humming.

"It was O'Neill." Teal'c finally spoke, sparing Sam from having to actually say the words.

"What do you mean, it was Jack?"

"It was Colonel O'Neill who shot you." This time Sam managed to speak.

Daniel's wide blue eyes stared at them incredulously, but he could see they were serious, and the denial died unspoken. He licked his lips and Teal'c started to offer another ice chip but he shook his head.

"Why?" he said finally, very softly.

"We don't know yet," said Sam, her own blue eyes intent on his, "but we know he was under some kind of mind control when it happened. Janet found a device, we think it's a transmitter, buried in the tissue of his brainstem. Daniel, you know the Colonel would never deliberately hurt you. This was someone using the Colonel to get to you." 

Daniel nodded absently, no longer looking at either of them. After a moment he spoke.

"Think I'll try and get some more sleep," he said finally.

"We will be nearby if you need us, DanielJackson," Teal'c said. Sam didn't speak again, but took his hand and squeezed, willing Daniel to look at her, but he either couldn't, or wouldn't.

"Have you discovered a way to deactivate the device, MajorCarter," Teal'c asked after they had stepped out into the hallway.

"Well," Sam sighed, leaning back against the wall tiredly, rubbing her eyes. "It seems similar to Urgo, actually. I'm hoping a concentrated magnetic pulse will cause it to go offline."

"That method was unsuccessful with Urgo," Teal'c responded, looking faintly concerned. Sam was nodding before he finished speaking.

"Yes, I know, but this device is larger, and I believe, not as sophisticated. Besides, I have a feeling that solving this problem is not quite as simple as deactivating the device. Daniel and the colonel were just starting to get back to normal..." Sam's voice trailed off. Too many things had strained the team to the breaking point already the last few months. This might be the last straw.

"I will remain here with DanielJackson. Perhaps you should go see Colonel O'Neill."

Sam glanced up as Teal'c's voice broke into her unpleasant thoughts. She nodded.

"I need to tell him what we've found out."

Sam watched as Teal'c took up a post near enough to hear Daniel's breathing, but still slightly apart. The head on the pillows didn't move; the blue eyes continued staring blindly at the wall.

Sighing, Sam made her way to where Colonel O'Neill was being held. He didn't appear to have moved at all since the last time she'd stopped in to check on him. She nodded to the MP standing outside the door and then knocked lightly, giving him some time before she came in. When he looked up, she was shocked at his drawn appearance. Something in his face reminded her suddenly, heartbreakingly, of Daniel, laying in his bed on the other side of the base. Like something in them had been broken and could never be repaired. Sam could only hope that wasn't so. Taking a deep breath, she forced a bright tone into her voice.

"Colonel O'Neill, good news. I think we might have an answer."

"Does he know yet?"

The voice was flat and emotionless, but the truth was revealed in the way his hands were clenched, white-knuckled on the edge of the table.

"About you?" Sam cursed inwardly. There was no easy way to do this. "Yes, we told him."

The colonel's shoulders tightened as if waiting for a blow, though his voice when he answered was still deceptively calm.

"Did he say anything?"

"He wanted to know why," Sam answered, trying for equal calm. "I told him we were still working on that part." The colonel took and let out a long breath. She went on quickly. "But I think I might have figured it out. When you were with Maybourne, were you seen by any medical staff?" The indirect question had surprised him and he furrowed his brow in thought.

"Yeah, just before the mission to the last planet. They wanted to do a complete checkout but Maybourne convinced them to settle for a routine physical." Sam's eyes had brightened.

"Any injections?"

"Yes," answered O'Neill, responding to Sam's excitement despite himself. "There was some virus or something going around on base and they inoculated me against it."

"That's when they did it!"

"Did what? Carter! What have you figured out!?!"

Sam was pacing back and forth now, talking rapidly. "When Janet and I did a complete MRI on you we found a tiny device buried in your brainstem; it looks like some kind of micro technology. It was small enough to be have been injected with a syringe. With all the technology that Maybourne and the NID were stealing from the Asgard and others, it's entirely possible that they discovered something that allowed remote access to someone's nervous system once it was implanted in the victim."

"And how is the fact that I've got some metal bug buried in my brain a good thing, Carter?" barked O'Neill. "A bug, I might add, that forced me to attempt to assassinate one of my team!"

"Sir! This means that all we need to do is contact the Asgard to prove your innocence! And I'm sure we'll be able to disable the device once we know how it works!" O'Neill was shaking his head slowly.

"It might explain what happened, Carter, but it won't prove my innocence."

Carter stared at him for a moment, not understanding.

"Sam, I should have been able to stop myself. I *could* have, otherwise why could I throw it off at the end? I just didn't try hard enough, and it almost cost Daniel his life." The last words were said almost in a whisper.

"Sir," she said helplessly, "Daniel..., Daniel will understand."

The dark brown eyes met hers and the pain in them was almost unbearable.

"Will he, Sam? After everything that's happened the last year?" She looked away, unable to hold his eyes.

"In the meantime, I'm pretty sure a strong magnetic pulse will disable the transmitter since its electrically based, and Frasier doesn't think it will do you any damage to leave in there," she said after a moment of quiet.

"So I don't need to worry about trying to kill you or Teal'c," Jack interrupted with brutal sarcasm. She went on without looking up.

"I'm going to go report my findings to Hammond but I wanted to tell you as soon as I could. You should be out of here in an hour or so. I'm sure Daniel would welcome a visitor."

Without looking at him again she knocked gently on the door and the MP let her out. She walked briskly to the next hallway juncture and turned the corner to a small conference room. After making sure the room was empty, she leaned against the door and hugged herself tightly with shaking hands for a few moments before she could go on and report to General Hammond.

`"You're a bright guy. You had to sense some of this."' The words echoed in Daniel's brain. `God, what am I thinking. Jack didn't do this on purpose. Sam's told you that. Teal'c's told you that.'

He didn't look, but knew Teal'c was still in the chair at the foot of his bed. Daniel just felt so empty, empty and foolish. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself that Jack hadn't really meant to hurt him, ever since that black ops mission Jack went on, things had felt off between them. And now this. He shifted restlessly, hissing through his teeth as the movement jarred his shoulder.

"O'Neill is very distressed that he has injured you," came Teal'c's solemn voice. "He would be here if he could be, DanielJackson."

"I think he's done enough!" Daniel retorted, shifting again and gasping at the pain.

"Do you believe O'Neill intentionally wounded you?" Teal'c sounded puzzled.

"No, I know he didn't." Daniel felt very tired and confused. "I just... I don't know what to think, Teal'c."

Teal'c started to respond, but Frasier entered at that moment, lifting the chart from the foot of the bed. She glanced down the page, her expression growing serious, eyebrows drawing together. Setting the chart down, she walked up next to Daniel and placed a hand on his forehead, brushing the sweat tipped hair aside gently.

"Daniel, how are you feeling?" she asked, looking at his face closely. There was a roaring in Daniel's ears and Janet seemed to be swaying slightly.

"I, uh, not so good, actually," he said after a moment, raising a shaking hand to rub at his eyes. Teal'c had come to stand beside Janet.

"It's just an infection, Daniel, nothing to worry about. We'll bump up the antibiotics in your IV and you'll be fine." Frasier motioned to a nurse, the tightness around her mouth a direct contrast to the calming tone she was using speaking to Daniel. "I'm going to increase your pain meds a little to make you more comfortable." Daniel was already too foggy to protest, not that Frasier would have been willing to accommodate him this time.

Rapidly a second bag joined the one already depositing fluids through an IV in his hand and Frasier hovered around him for a few minutes before gesturing for Teal'c to follow her.

"This is more than an infection, is it not," Teal'c stated. It wasn't a question. Janet sighed heavily.

"To be honest, I'm not really sure what's going on. He was coming along fine. I had already started a round of antibiotics to ensure he didn't develop an infection. The fact that this has come on so suddenly has me worried."

"I am concerned as well. DanielJackson seems quite troubled over O'Neill's involvement in his injury."

"He's not the only one, Teal'c," said Janet grimly.

"Good job, Major!" Hammond said strongly. He strode out of his office out into the gate control room.

"Sergeant Davis, contact the Asgard immediately. Tell them it's urgent. Let me know as soon as we hear from them."

"Yes, sir."

Hammond glanced at Sam. "I assume you've already informed the colonel." Sam flushed and looked down.

"Quite all right, Major. I would have done the same thing. Carry on with what you can do and I'll notify you as soon as we hear from the Asgard." The major saluted and headed back down to her lab.

For once it didn't take the Asgard long to respond and confirm the microscopic hitchhiker O'Neill had picked up was in fact part of the technology the NID had stolen from them and Sam found herself back in the conference room, surprised to see Colonel O'Neill there as well as General Hammond.

"I am sorry we did not detect its presence in your body, O'Neill," Thor said in a holographic projection from his ship. "Major Carter is correct. I have rendered the *paern* inactive. It will be absorbed by your body within a few of your months."

"No problem, Thor," said Jack O'Neill, forcing a hearty tone in his voice. "Nothing we couldn't handle."

The little grey alien seemed to be searching O'Neill's face for signs of sarcasm, but as Sam asked herself, who could tell?

"Once again we extend our thanks to you, O'Neill," concluded Thor, O'Neill saluting in Thor's general direction as the image rippled and then disappeared completely. Sam was fairly certain that the gesture the Colonel really wanted to make was quite different.

Hammond turned back to Jack.

"I'm sure you're eager to see how Dr. Jackson is doing?"

"I'm free to go then, General?" O'Neill asked, his face expressionless.

"I'd like for you to stop off at the infirmary and let Dr. Frasier have one last look at you, but after that, yes, you're off duty till further notice," the General answered, sounding faintly concerned.

"Thank you sir." As he left the room, Hammond gestured for Carter to follow the colonel. As she hurried after him, Jack completely ignored her existence.

He was moving fast and she almost had to run to keep up. So when he stopped abruptly outside the door to the base infirmary she careened into him, propelling both of them awkwardly into the room. Janet was just stepping away from Daniel's bedside. When she saw Jack, she smiled wearily.

"Colonel, I'm so glad to see you."

Jack interrupted brusquely. "The general ordered me to have one last exam before I could leave the base." Frasier looked questioningly at Carter and the major hastened to explain.

"The device we found was an Asgard medical micro robot. It's been turned off. Thor says it will be absorbed into Colonel O'Neill's body. The colonel had absolutely no control over what happened. Thor is going to help us track down the source of the programming. There is a specific frequency..."

Jack cleared his throat. "Can we just do whatever you need to do? I'm tired and I'd like to get home and have a beer." There was a moment of stunned silence before Janet spoke.

"Of course, Colonel. If you'll just step over here."

And without a single glance to the corner of the infirmary where Daniel lay, Jack followed. Teal'c still sat, silently observing. He and Sam exchanged glances, and after some silent communication, Sam took Teal'c's place by Daniel while Teal'c silently approached the bed where O'Neill sat, having his vitals taken.

"DanielJackson is awake," he stated unemotionally. Jack's eyes continued staring straight ahead.

"Glad to hear it," he responded quietly, but Teal'c could hear the razor edge of pain and warning in his voice.

Teal'c did not pretend to always understand the Tau'ri. But O'Neill was a warrior as well, a comrade-at-arms and they had saved each other's life more times than he wanted to count.

"He was most disturbed when we revealed you were the one who had shot him." Jack's head slewed sideways and his pallor became even more pronounced.

"I'm not exactly turning handsprings about it myself, Teal'c," he glowered, the muscles of his jaw tensing.

"Then why do you not wish to go and speak to him?" Teal'c continued implacably.

"It's not that simple," Jack said, sitting slowly back down onto the hospital bed. Janet began gingerly attempting to take his blood pressure once again, muttering something under her breath. Jack glared at her.

"You have something to add, Doctor?" he asked coldly. Brown eyes snapping, she glared right back at him.

"I said," and she spoke loudly and clearly, "that it *is* that simple!"

Jack stood abruptly, ripping the blood pressure cuff off. He looked across the room to where Sam sat at Daniel's bedside, and for the first time since he had shot him, met Daniel's eyes.

Those piercing blue eyes were fastened on his face like Daniel was drilling for oil. He couldn't read the expression in them though, and that alone made Jack uneasy. He just stared, not knowing what to say, his guilt scalding his throat like acid.

"Yeah, Jack," said Daniel in a strangely bright brittle voice. "It's very simple." Before Jack could speak, he held up his hand. Jack noticed it was shaking almost as much as Daniel's voice was. "Actually, allow me. It had something to do with an undercover mission you couldn't tell us about, right? And yeahsureyoubetcha, you're awful sorry about it, but it's over with now, so what's the big deal?"

The blood had rushed up into Jack's face as Daniel had spoken, and then washed back out again. Thrusting his hands deeply into his pockets, he swallowed hard, and turned away.

Very carefully and precisely, Jack placed the twelfth empty Guinness bottle on the coffee table, and reaching down into the cooler beside his chair, pulled number thirteen out. The phone was ringing again. He had considered yanking the cord out of the wall, but decided the ringing was another part of the penance he was doing. Penance wasn't the right word though, because the implied that eventually it would recompense for what he had done. But he could never make this right. This debt he could never repay. But he let it ring anyway. It rang a long time again before it stopped.

"One, two, three," he counted and then pointed at the cell phone that sat surrounded by beer bottles as it began to ring. After three chimes though, it stopped. Jack glanced up from his study of the beer bottle label, faintly surprised. He smiled a little grimly, and popping the bottle cap off, toasted the phone.

"Cheers, Carter," he grunted and then took a pull, the dark brown fluid flowing smoothly down, the lines of his throat working.

Maybe he'd get a little peace now, Jack thought with bitter irony, knowing he had forever lost the few meager shreds of peace he'd managed to scrabble together since the team he'd made his family came into his life. Suddenly blind with anger, he cursed, sweeping the detritus of bottles, old newspapers and empty Chinese take-out boxes onto the floor and threw the bottle against the wall with such force it broke, brown liquid seeping slowly down the paint. He stared at it for a moment, breathing hard, then reaching down into the cooler beside his chair, pulled number fourteen out.

Sam watched in disbelief as O'Neill turned away from Daniel and left. But what was even worse, even more aching, was that there was no surprise on Daniel's face. There wasn't any expression actually. No surprise, no hurt, no anger. It was as though a mask had settled down over his face. Sam wasn't sure she'd ever seen him look like that before, and then covering her mouth to hide the pain, she remembered when he had come back from talking to Jack that other time. Without speaking again, or looking at anyone, Daniel slowly turned his face to the wall. His eyes glittered, but not with tears. Through a silence so heavy she thought she would smother, Sam got up and walked out into the hallway, Teal'c and Janet behind her. Jack was already out of sight.

"Teal'c," Sam said quietly after a moment, "why don't you go kel-no-reem and relieve me here in a few hours." Teal'c eyes were intent on her face, and she knew he was evaluating her emotional state. He must have decided she was alright because he inclined his head to her and to Janet in that enormously gracious way he had and excused himself. Sam wasn't sure she was alright, but someone absolutely had to stay with Daniel, especially after what had just happened. After discreetly pulling the door closed behind them and checking for any other personnel close enough to overhear, Janet spoke.

"Daniel's just angry," Janet said, trying to reassure an obviously shaken Sam. Sam nodded but she also knew why Jack couldn't face Daniel. Knew he was convinced Daniel's injury was his fault, was convinced it could have been Daniel's life, knew the horror of shooting his best friend was eating away at his soul like battery acid.

"I think the colonel and Daniel are just going to need a little time to adjust to what happened. There could still be effects from the paern device too." Janet took a deep breath and expelled it in a long heavy sigh, then as Sam's last words sank in, started to look concerned.

"Did he mention any symptoms to you? Headaches? Problems with his sight?" Sam shook her head.

"Nothing like that, Janet. I just..., I think they just needs a little more time," she ended lamely.

The expression on Janet's face changed to relief, and then a kind of pained understanding. She pushed the door open and glanced in at Daniel. He hadn't moved since they left the room but his eyes were closed.

"I'm going to head down to the commissary and get some coffee. Do you want me to bring you a cup?" Sam smiled gratefully at Janet, and for more than the offer.

"That would be great. I have a feeling this could be a long night." Slowly she walked back into the infirmary and sat down at Daniel's side. He wasn't asleep, but she wasn't willing yet to intrude on his need for silence, and so just sat, hoping he knew she was there.

Daniel thrashed restlessly and Sam jerked awake. Groaning as protesting muscles complained about the infirmary chairs, she took a look at Daniel and called urgently for Janet. The doctor was at her side, looking as worried as Sam felt. Daniel's shoulder where the bullet had been removed was so swollen it pressed tightly against the thin cotton of his gown, the red color showing through, and the heat was palpable without even touching the skin.

Sam gently brushed his sweat-plastered hair back from off his forehead. Except for two bright spots of red high on his cheekbones, Daniel's skin was bleached of all color. Again he moved and cried out wildly, fighting against an enemy only he could see, unseeing eyes wide in pain and terror. Janet felt his forehead and swore quietly to herself.

"Janet, what is happening?" Sam asked urgently.

Janet was busy calling for assistance. She glanced at Sam and shook her head as the room filled suddenly with medical personnel.

"I don't know, Sam," she said, frustration clear in her face and her voice. "I don't know *what* is wrong, but I'm going to find out!"

Jack slumped in his chair, feeling around in the cooler for another beer. All his fingers met was melted water from the ice he'd packed the Guinness in, and even that was warm. He squinted at the clock, trying to focus bleary eyes but all he could see was a floating white blob.

`Damn,' he thought wearily, without emotion. `That was a waste of good beer.' The phone rang again. He'd lost count of how many times Carter had tried to call him.

This time he reached for the cord and *did* yank it out of the wall, but the ringing didn't stop. He looked puzzled at the end of the cord in his hand as the trilling continued. He knew it wasn't the cell phone because that had been dropped in the toilet around beer number seventeen. The ringing changed to a hammering and it suddenly dawned on Jack someone was at the door. Growling, he stumbled to his feet and staggered to the door.

"Jus' leave me the'hell `lone," he shouted into Teal'c's chest, after tripping on the threshold. The big man simply grasped him firmly around his upper arms and lifted him upright. Carefully he guided O'Neill back into his house and closed the door behind them.

He directed O'Neill back into his cluttered living room, and after observing the debris of bottles and garbage already on the floor, simply swept the latest set off the coffee table and settled Jack there, holding him steady with one hand as he flipped open his cell phone.

"MajorCarter," he said mellifluously. "He is here and we will be returning in an hour after he has," and he glanced down at Jack before going on, "cleaned up. I know time is short, but it is unavoidable."

"I'm not goin' anywhere," muttered Jack belligerently. Teal'c gazed down at him with a serene, but implacable face.

"O'Neill, DanielJackson is very sick. Very sick," he repeated. He paused until Jack found himself forced to meet his eyes. "And he is calling for you."

The voice was almost unrecognizable as eager, rapid-fire means of communication for Daniel Jackson. Hoarse from wrenching cries, Sam listened as Daniel seemed to be relieving all his worst nightmares, or memories, the two seemed to be indistinguishable.

Dr. Frasier was doing everything she could think of, and had consulted with anyone that might have something that could help, but nothing seemed to work. Sam sat at his bedside, holding his hand through the web of monitor lines and cables that filled the room. He hadn't been aware of anyone or anything around him for hours now. They had to restrain him early on, but for the last little while it hadn't been necessary; he simply didn't have enough strength to do anything but call. They still were looped loosely around his wrists. Sam bit back the tears as he continued.

"J'ck, J'ck, where, J'ck?"

Janet had tried sedating him, but as weak as he was, she didn't want to risk depressing his vitals in any way.

There was a sound at the door, choked off. Colonel O'Neill stood there swaying, eyes dark and staring out of a pale face smudged with whiskers. Teal'c stood behind him, a look of deep sorrow etching lines around his eyes and mouth. Sam shot to her feet and rushed over to him.

"Thank God you're here, Colonel."

O'Neill gave no sign he heard her, just moved, almost unwillingly until he stood besides Daniel's bed, looking down at him, the alcohol burning out of his system in a flood of guilt and pain.

"Oh God, Danny," the Colonel rasped out. "Did I do this to you?" At the sound of his voice, Daniel stopped. The eyes turned toward him, shaking white hands reached out and were caught by the restraints. The colonel swore viciously and turning, dragged the chair, pulled it next to Daniel and reaching in, took the cold thin hands in his own strong brown ones.

"J'ck," whispered Daniel, the words a breath in the hushed room. "Where?"

The colonel cleared his throat.

"I'm here now, Daniel." The hands gripped his tightly and the disoriented blue eyes tried to focus on his face.

"J'ck, don' go. Don' leave." The pain in Jack's eyes at Daniel's words looked like an old friend he was welcoming back. He shook his head.

"Not going anywhere, Danny. Staying right here." Daniel's fevered eyes searched Jack's face for the truth and seemed to find what he needed, because although his grasp never loosened on Jack's hands, he gave a little nod, and his eyelids drooped shut. Panicked, Jack looked around wildly for Janet but she was beside them, her hand on Jack's shoulder.

"It's all right, he's just sleeping," she said assuring him. Jack turned back to look at Daniel, and took a long deep breath. "But we've got to figure out what is causing this. Daniel is running out of time."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"It was the bullet," Janet announced triumphantly as she moved into the room at high speed an hour later, startling Jack out of the light doze he'd fallen into, Daniel's hands still clasping his.

"Well that would seem fairly obvious," said Jack in a soft but irritated voice, glancing at Daniel to see if he'd been disturbed. Janet paused a moment to give him a gimlet glare.

"When I say it was the bullet," she continued, her voice a little quieter, "I mean that the bullet itself was treated with something to make it particularly deadly."

"Like a poisoned arrow," Sam interjected quickly.

Janet nodded.

"Exactly like that. I should have thought about it as soon as it was determined the Colonel's `hitchhiker' was an Asgard device, but it didn't occur to me until a few minutes ago. Sure enough, when I ran tests, it's right there. The bullet was coated with some kind of toxin that once inside the body, became active. The bullet looks perfectly normal because it *is*, it just has a passenger that's deadly."

"There seems to be a lot of that going around," snapped Jack. "Can you fix it or stop it or ..." and he waved a hand irritably.

"Yes," Janet said, a relieved smile on her face. "Once I identified the substance, it was fairly easy to synthesize an antidote. It should be ready in a few minutes."

"How long until we're sure it works?" asked Sam. Janet looked pleased with herself.

"That's the nice part; there should be some results almost immediately. Of course Daniel's body has been pretty thoroughly stressed and exhausted, so it will take him some time to recover, but we should see an improvement in his condition right away."

True to her word, five minutes later Janet was injecting a syringe into Daniel's IV. Daniel didn't rouse, but his breathing evened out, and the changes on some of the monitor displays seemed to please Janet. Gently she brushed the hair off Daniel's forehead and his eyes fluttered open.

"How are you feeling, Daniel?" she asked softly. He blinked at her, trying to orient himself. Drawing a cautious deep breath, he smiled a little.

"Better," then he glanced past Janet and saw Jack, saw his hands gripping Jack's, and very deliberately loosened his grasp. The moment Jack saw his expression change, he was pushing himself to his feet.

"Wait a minute," interrupted Sam urgently. Jumping to her feet, she pointed at the Colonel. "This means you didn't override the programming at all!"

Jack stiffened and was poised to head for the door until Teal'c clamped a big hand over his shoulder and pushed him back down beside Daniel firmly.

"I believe it is important for you both to hear what MajorCarter has to say, O'Neill," and he looked at Daniel pointedly. Daniel glared at Teal'c and then turned his head away to stare again at the wall. Jack's face went blank and his eyes went black, which Sam knew meant he was livid but he didn't try to move again. Teal'c looked calmly at her. "Please continue, MajorCarter." Sam took a deep breath and started pacing.

"Colonel, you said that at the end you thought you threw off the programming, isn't that right? And the fact that you thought you were able to do such a thing, makes you feel accountable for what happened to Daniel?"

The look on his face told Sam that he would never forgive her for this. She hoped desperately he would hear her out. He answered through his teeth.

"Yes, Major Carter," he answered, grinding the words out. Sam glanced down, seeing Daniel still facing the wall.

"But Colonel, it was never the idea for you to *kill* Daniel. I mean, at least, not with the initial shot. This must have been an experiment on more than one level. First of all to see if they could control you sufficiently that they could override all your normal emotions, and then to see if this toxin would remain undetected long enough to kill. Don't you see, Colonel?" Inwardly Sam implored both of them to listen, to think about what she was saying, to not be so damned stubborn for once! "It was enough for you to shoot him, you didn't have to kill him. You *might* have been becoming more conscious towards the end, but the last thing they would have wanted was for you to kill him with the shot."

When Sam stopped talking, she found she was shaking, and groped behind her for one of the chairs, landing in it awkwardly, her eyes still fixed on the Colonel's face, not looking away as he worked through what she had said. She knew it would be difficult for him to give up the responsibility for what had happened, but he *had* to see he was as much a victim as Daniel. He lifted his eyes slowly from his hands clenched in fists on his knees to look at Daniel's stricken face.

"Jack." #It was never your fault.#

"Daniel." #I don't blame you for not believing me; for being angry.#

"I,uhhh..." #There isn't anything I can say to make this better.#

"Yeah..." #It's over. We're both still here.#

Jack tentatively reached over and grasped Daniel's uninjured shoulder, and Daniel grinned, holding Jack's eyes with his own. His face slowly clearing, Jack nodded to Carter. She took a deep breath.

"When we find out who did this to us, Daniel," the Colonel said, his voice carrying a full load of menace.

Daniel finished hoarsely, "They are going to be sorry sons of bitches." He took a long deep breath, and hand still in Jack's, closed his eyes and went to sleep again. Teal'c gently squeezed O'Neill's shoulder and moved to stand beside Carter.

"How long will it take for DanielJackson to recover?" he asked Janet.

"The wound itself wasn't that serious. Now that the toxin has been neutralized I'd say we should start having to deal with an antsy archaeologist in, ohhh, about two days."

"Sounds good to me, Doc," Jack muttered and then turned to glare at Carter, though there was a sparkle in his eyes that had been missing before. "And did you send Teal'c out to shanghai me?"

"Well," Sam answered, her own blue eyes glowing, "the mountain couldn't come to Mohammad!"

**The End**

  


* * *

> © February 2005 Not mine, just playing with them, and I don't   
>  get paid to do it, either. The characters mentioned in this   
>  story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I,   
>  the Goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE   
>  SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright   
>  property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright   
>  Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This   
>  fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant   
>  for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself   
>  are the sole property of the author. 

* * *

  


_http://www.stargatefan.com_


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